Here we go again. . .

That's right, I'm pregnant again! I've decided to blog here again to document the ups and downs. I like having this blog to look back at my pregnancy with AG, kind of like a journal. AG by the way is 2 now and a delightfully mischievous little one. So here we go again!

At something like 3 weeks, 2 days, I took a test that was faintly positive. I was shocked. We'd been off the pill for 2 mos but we weren't timing or trying at all. . .and with my previous fertility problems, I did not expect to become pregnant. That said, I am a compulsive stick-peer when not using birth control, so I bought a 50 pack off of Amazon for $10 and was indulging my compulsion several days a month. I was also hoping to catch even a very early pregnancy that might not last because I was curious about the state of my Fallopian tubes and didn't want to have a radiology test done to see if they were open. ANYway, on the day in question, I peed on the stick and left it sitting by my computer and forgot about it. I went to lie down for a nap, remembered I'd left it laying there and went to throw it away so GG wouldn't ask me what it was. As I reached to drop it into the trash can, I was very surprised to see a faint line!

Fast forward to 4 weeks, blood draw showed HCG at 531 and progesterone at 30, both good for early. Repeat draw at 4 weeks, 2 days showed HCG at 1119. Also good. That's all the info for now. We've decided not to keep it a secret this time as we did with AG. GG is old enough to understand the possibility of losing it and I want to celebrate this little miracle even if it's with me for only a few weeks. I hope it sticks but if it doesn't, it's in the hands of God anyway.

Today, I am 6 weeks, 2 days and I've been having waves of nausea mildly since 5 weeks 6 days. I also have a raging cold so not sure if that has something to do with it. Right now, sugary bubble gum (Dubble Bubble) or Coca-cola flavored crushed ice is doing the trick. Also eating what I crave and nothing else seems to be good. My OB gave me a prenatal vitamin with extra B6 to take throughout the day that is supposed to help with nausea. So far, so good. Here's hoping. =) Ultrasound to check for heartbeat scheduled for 11/9/11 at 7 weeks, 2 days.

Death By Morning Sickness?

Photo by: Katharine Moriarty
Okay, so obviously if I'm writing this post, I'm not dead. I'm just wondering how many consecutive days one can throw up repeatedly and stay alive. Okay, so I'm being dramatic and I know I won't die from it, but I did genuinely wonder this morning if my stomach can physically turn inside out and come up my esophagus? It's bad.

If I look at the big picture, it's too overwhelming. 5 more weeks of this nausea seems like forever, so I'm focusing on getting through today. Also, scientific research says HCG levels (the hormone thought to cause the nausea) peak between 8 and 10 weeks and then start to decline. Hopefully that means these few weeks are the worst of it. I need hope so I'm going to believe that. Don't get me wrong, in the midst of all this, I'm grateful that the sickness means all is well, but it's hard to keep your "chin up" when your head is constantly hanging in the toilet. . .

A Long Wait Ahead

I heard back from the NP at my doctor's office. She reiterated that my numbers are rising as they should. I asked her if I should be concerned about the more than doubling HCG and she said absolutely not. She said they want it to at least double and mine is good. The bad news? He doesn't want to see me again for THREE WEEKS. I am going to lose my mind. I know that the ultrasound at what will be 7 weeks, 4 days is a normal time to do one as they won't be able to see much before then, but part of me was hoping there wouldn't be such a gap this time. That's a long wait when you're a worrier like me!

I Have Issues

After compulsively calling home to check my answering machine this morning for an hour after the doctor's office opened at 9:00 a.m., I finally called them to check my HCG results. My level on Monday was 610! I was very excited and shaky (because I was very nervous and shaky before that) and I quickly hung up. I forgot to ask when I should come back in for more blood work or an ultrasound. I called right back and they said someone will call me this afternoon with that information because my doctor won't be in until after 2:00 p.m. It's now almost 4:00 and no one's called. I'm trying not to be a pain in the butt, realizing I'm not the only patient there.

As I calculated in my head, I realize that my levels almost quadrupled in 3 days, not just doubled. My new fear? Molar pregnancy. That's right folks, after a few minutes of revelling in my good news, my mind immediately turned to what else could be wrong if it's not ectopic. I have doom and gloom issues. So now I've read several things on that topic and I'm not reassured. If it is something like that, the only thing to do is wait and see. It's too early to tell on ultrasound. So why can't I just relax and assume it's just an ordinary healthy pregnancy? It's not in my nature, and I'm just not ready to accept the possibility yet. If I do, my hopes have a lot further to fall if something happens. Time will tell I guess!

Doctor Visit-4 weeks, 4 days

I just finished at the doctor's office. My doctor said my progesterone from Friday is normal and my HCG is "low." Not sure what that means since his NP yesterday said it was normal in early pregnancy. He then came back in and said it was normal for early. I'm still a bit confused. Most things I've read online say 120 HCG is definitely in the normal range for 4 weeks, 1 day, which is what I was when they did it.

In any event, he is repeating the HCG today. He said he'll have it back in a day or so, like it was no big deal. Then the phlebotomist came in and drew my blood, put the HCG vial in a bag marked "stat" and said it would be back in 4-5 hours and that they would page my doctor when the results arrived. This makes it seem a lot more urgent than what he said to me personally.

My doctor said he won't do an ultrasound till my HCG levels reach 3000-4000, which by my calculations would be next week. Unfortunately, he was so rushed today that he didn't even tell me when to schedule a follow up. This is not like him. He's normally very attentive and careful to answer any questions. I'm going to chalk it up to a busy day for him. Everybody has them. He also warned me that he saw that the pap smear he did caused me to bleed a little, so when I see some spotting over the next day or so, not to panic. Glad to have that warning ahead of time, because "panic" is my middle name.

I guess by this time tomorrow, I'll know if my HCG levels are doubling appropriately. I hate waiting.