Update 12 weeks, 4 days

Not much of an update really. As far as I know, all is currently well. I got brave and decided to wait the usual 4 weeks from my last ultrasound, so nothing new until 12/21. Still nauseous but not as bad all the time. I have some days where I feel icky all day, others where it's just once in the morning and then barring strong smells, I'm okay. I *think* I heard the heartbeat on my doppler a few days ago at 12 weeks but it was in and out so I couldn't count it. . .Hoping that at least means my little wiggly bean is still hanging in there. . .

Doppler

Well, I ignored my good friend, Sara's advice (see comment on my prior post-sorry, Sara!) and bought a home doppler. I got it from Smartmomma.com and paid for expedited shipping (I'm SO impatient) so I got it today. I then spent the better part of 20 minutes searching for the baby's heartbeat, which I found several times, but never for more than 5 seconds or so. The thing didn't come with a battery so I "borrowed" one from our smoke detector, which probably isn't at full power, so I couldn't get the display screen to accurately count the beats. It kept saying crazy stuff like 70 and 82, but I could clearly hear that it was a rapid baby heartbeat. So I checked with the clock (counted for 10 seconds, then multiplied by 6) and it was actually 156 bpm-which is normal.

I mashed around so long and so hard (and was covered in the stupid gel stuff when I was done) that I actually made my skin sore, so I spent the next hour or so being worried that I may have harmed the baby somehow. I'm over it now, as I'm sure he or she is fine inside the little sac of fluid, but I'll probably only check for the HB once every few days just to be safe. 15 weeks today, YAY!

Checking In-14 weeks, 4 days

I realized today that my worry level must have decreased a bit because I haven't felt the need to blog about it in a while. I think I'm feeling a tiny bit of movement, but really can't be sure because it's so early. How excited I will be when I start feeling regular kicks! I can hardly wait.

GG is too excited for words (well, not really, anyone who knows her know she's never without words). She asks questions about the baby every day-how big, where in my tummy, can the baby taste that? etc. She suffers from a little worry also, which I'm sure is normal after a loss. The other day, she was hanging on me or something and I told her to stop because it made my tummy hurt. She backed up immediately with worried eyes and said, "You mean it might make the baby die?" I assured her that nothing she could do would make the baby die, and she looked relieved. I felt bad for saying anything that might lead her down that thought path.

I'm still getting sick, which is actually just making me mad now. I thought I remembered all sickness abating at 14 weeks with GG, but then again, it may have been at the end of the 14th week. I'm holding out hope. I didn't throw up for two whole days and thought maybe it was over, then it came back with a vengeance Saturday morning and all day long on Sunday. Today it was just the morning, which is much easier to handle. I really hope I'm not sick the whole 9 months. I am not a good sick person.

Overall, all is well. I'm contemplating renting a home doppler unit so we can listen to the baby's heartbeat whenever we want. When I'm feeling a bit anxious, I could just quickly make sure it's still beating, and I like instant gratification. I'll blog about it if I decide to order one. I would pester my doctor a lot less!